Remember When...

I know I will never forget, yet I feel the need to reminisce about that day two years ago when I thought my life was ending. I sobbed hysterically for hours, searching online for any and all hope that the Doctors were wrong- that my baby boy's heart could still grow before he was born and be whole.

I remember having to call all of our family, close friends, and co-workers, and tell them that our son was critically ill and would literally need to fight to live once he was separated from me. No one knew what to say.

I remember too many nights spent calling out to God to fix my son. Begging for a miraculous healing for Evan. Oh, if only I knew..

He had a bigger plan for me, for us, for my family.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart  and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.
                                                 Proverbs 3:5-6


I can't deny that I have struggled with this verse over the past two years more than I would like to admit. It's so hard to shake all the fear; to trust that He knows what is best for my boy.. Yet every.single.time I have feared, the Lord has reassured me that all is well. He has got this! 

If I could have peeked into my future, to see how full of life this little boy is, I never would have believed it was real. Living with half a heart sounds so impossible! But thriving with half a heart? No way. Yet here he is, so incredibly happy, with bright brown eyes that shine and a smile that you literally can't resist. And I love him, I adore him! Every single hug, kiss, and smile is treasured in this house. Every single thing I took advantage of in my pre-heart mom life is treasured! 

Life pre-heart momma status was ok. And life in the early stages as a heart momma was difficult. But being a heart momma now.. is incredible. God will never give you more than you can handle, this I have learned, struggle after struggle.. 

Yesterday Evan had a routine Cardiology visit. He was super bummed out, his favorite nurse and sonographer weren't in the office and I could tell he missed them. We are really lucky that Evan has always loved the office visits. I've heard countless horror stories of children crying as soon as they walk in the door, and who can blame them!! We are usually in the office for 2 hours during Evan's appointments, cooperating for that long is a challenge for an adult, let alone a toddler! But every time he amazes us! Evan was giggling and saying "NO" to every question asked. 

EKG time! 

Evan's O2 sats were in the low 80's yesterday, which is just a tad lower than normal. His EKG and Echo results were fantastic though! There appeared to be no change from his last visit 3 months ago and everyone was impressed with how tall Evan is getting! He is now 34" and 27lbs, which means he has grown 3" since the beginning of the year! 

Do you see how patient this little guy is? He is such a calm natured kid, a natural cuddle bug. He sat thru his echo like a champ! Of course, he did have some help from Yo Gabba Gabba and needed to hold momma's hand the entire time. So sweet! I don't know many toddlers who can sit still for 30 minutes while a stranger scans their bare chest! I'm so proud! 

No changes were made at his appointment and we will be returning in 3 months for the next follow up. 

Now, I know this was all fantastic news, but I really saved the most exciting for last.. On the way home, Evan fell asleep in the car AND stayed asleep when I brought him inside and laid him in his bed! No joke, that was the first time in the history of Evan that this has happened! Seriously, if you're the parent of a baby who refuses to nap in the car, you will understand my excitement. ;) 

I hope to post in the very near future that Evan is walking, he is so close! Please continue to pray for his physical delays. I can't wait to see him walk and run with his friends! <3 

the October Dress Project.

Heard of it? No? Me either, until late last year when I saw some friends posting pictures of themselves in the same dress every day. I didn't give it much thought until a few months later and had almost forgotten about it now that October is quickly slowly creeping up on me.

So, what is it? It's a brilliant idea, created by two friends when one of their grandmas commented that women only needed one dress to wear an entire week, and one for Sundays. They decided to wear one dress the entire month of October. Yes, you read that right. The same dress everyday for 31 days. 

Why? The basis is simple- anti-consumerism, pro-simplicity, anti-conformity, pro-imagination. But you can transform the ODP to mean whatever you want it to! I will be focusing on pro-simplicity. 

I'm going to be transparent here for minute. I am materialistic, self-conscious, and more consumed with my outward appearance than I am with my inner-self. Gross, right? I know. And I have acknowledged these faults and have been diligently praying for God to help me change my ways. And in several ways, I have changed. But I still have a long journey ahead of me. Sigh, don't we all? 

I need this challenge. I need to transform myself. I need to prove to myself that I don't need this season's hottest trends or name brand whatever or brand new clothes to feel like ME. I don't need all these things to define who I am! 

Want to join me? Come on, wearing the same thing for a month doesn't sound appealing to you?! Your reasons behind participating in the the ODP do not have to be the same as mine. Your guidelines do not have to be the same as mine! Think about it, pray about it, give it a try. I stumbled upon a friend's post from ODP 2011 and seriously, she came up with some super cute outfits! Challenge yourself people!

These are my personal guidelines for the October Dress Project:
- Since I do need a few staples in order to survive the entire month, I will need to purchase some items. But I will not buy new! I will shop thrift, yard sales, or my friends' closets. 
- I will sell unused clothing items/household items in order to purchase these "new to me" items I think I need. 
- I will not be wearing my dress to the gym or to sleep.
- I will not purchase any new clothing or accessory items for myself the entire month of October.
- I will not repeat the same look during the month. 
- I will learn to love myself for who I am, not for what I am wearing. 

I'm not gonna lie, this is going to be very difficult for me to stick with. Luckily, one of my closest friends has agreed to dive into this adventure for the first time with me! I'm not sure we quite know what we are getting ourselves in to, but I can guarantee we are both fired up for the Lord to work on our hearts through this challenge! 

P.S. Yes, you can wash your dress! ;) 

DIY Rustic Fall Wreath

I don't know about you, but I absolutely love September thru December! I love Fall colors, the family get-togethers, the humidity dying down, and the FOOD! This year, I am determined to get some crafting done and finally finish some awesome DIY projects. 

Today, the women in my husband's family got together to eat and drink wine make some holiday wreaths. Everyone else made theirs out of fabric and wire wreath forms and they came out amazing! However, my husband and I are smack in the middle of a "no spend month" and while I wanted to participate, I didn't want to spend the extra money to make a fabric wreath when I had some leftover grapevine wreaths in the shed! So I headed to Michael's and grabbed some fall foliage, which happened to be on sale, and decided to figure it out as I went. I don't want to toot my own horn, but Honk Honk! My wreath turned out fabulous! Unfortunately (for you), I was too distracted by my hilarious in-laws to take step by step photos so you will just have to bear with me! 

Supplies:

1 Grapevine wreath

3-4 small bunches of flowers/foliage 

1 spool of 2" coordinating ribbon OR 1 pre-made bow

10" piece of curling ribbon or string (omit if you are using a pre-made bow)

Hot glue gun 

Scissors 

Step 1- 

Cut all of your flowers and foliage off the branches, leaving about 2" of stem. 

Step 2- 

Arrange your flowers/foliage on one half of the wreath and hot glue into place once you are happy with the placement. 

The only progress shot.. My bad. -_-

Step 3-

Make your bow. There is a great tutorial on how to make a wreath bow here. Skip this step if you purchased a pre-made bow.

Step 4- 

Attach your bow to the bottom of your arrangement on the wreath by tying the string through the center of the bow and around the wreath. 

The finished product! 

 Yes, I know it is still Summer, but I love the look of this wreath so much that I couldn't wait to put it up! I adore the rustic look; I live in the country and it is totally appropriate.

The whole wreath cost me about $10 to make. Everything was on sale plus I had a 10% off coupon good towards my total purchase! Michael's had wreaths in the store that weren't as cute as this one for $50!!

I plan on making a Rustic Christmas wreath in a similar style as soon as the Christmas decorations hit the shelves! :) Stay tuned!

My secret to endless amounts of energy

Since becoming a stay at home mom 15 months ago, I have struggled with productivity. At first, I enjoyed staying up late, dropping Elli off at school, and napping with the baby. The house was clean within an hour, and stayed that way. Once we started homeschooling, I needed to get my act together and not only wake up early, but stay awake. It was so hard to fall asleep earlier than 2am! And if there is one thing I love, it's sleep. I can sleep 15 hours if left undisturbed. Something had to change. About the same time, I was mentally ready to lose the last bit of baby weight Evan oh so generously left me with. I started waking up at 5am and heading right to the gym. It.was.so.hard!! I have always loved staying in shape, but willingly waking up that early was a struggle. But I did it! And after a few weeks of forcing myself to get out of bed, I was able get up as soon as the alarm went off - and looked forward to the time to myself at the gym! The energy I have throughout the day is incredible! Not only am I sleeping better, but I have also lost 13lbs. I'm only 7lbs away from my goal weight! 

If you are feeling sluggish, I highly recommend setting that alarm and getting active first thing in the morning! Walk on a treadmill while reading a book, lift some weights to your favorite songs. Just do it! I'm currently blogging while cooling down on the treadmill ;) Don't make excuses. If you fall off the bandwagon a couple days, just pick back up where you left off. You are the only obstacle in the way of being/staying fit. 

Sisters by Heart/Linked by Heart

Earlier this year, I was blessed with the opportunity to join my favorite nonprofit organization, Sisters by Heart, as a Regional Coordinator for their newest project, Linked by Heart. Sisters by Heart was founded in 2010 by a group of dedicated HLHS moms who wanted to offer something that was truly lacking in our community; hope and support. They joined forces and over the past 2 years have formed into an amazing organization, reaching hundreds of families that would have had no where to turn for support. Sisters by Heart sends care packages to newly diagnosed HLHS families that include super awesome items every Momma needs for themselves and their HLHS babe while in the hospital awaiting and recovering from their first open heart surgery. And their blog.. Man. These women work so hard to provide accurate and encouraging information to the hundreds of HLHS moms on the web, scouring for hope that their baby can make it through this journey. As if that weren't enough, SBH recently expanded their organization to include Linked by Heart. They have recruited HLHS moms across the country, myself included, to help support the entire HLHS community, not just the newly diagnosed moms. By registering in the Linked by Heart database, families from all over the country are able to connect with other HLHS families in close proximity, by similar complications, same hospital, etc. It is truly an amazing resource and I am so honored to "meet" and support the moms in the Southeast region!

Sisters by Heart/Linked by Heart have touched so many lives already. They rely on monetary donations to keep the support by way of care packages going. If you are touched by the hearts of the women of this organization and want to help send some love and support to Mommas of babies with a broken heart, please consider sending a donation their way here.

It's here!

For months I have wanted to sit down and revamp my blog Evan's blog. As much as I have loved using this blog to update everyone on Evan's condition, I have wanted something more; a space to write freely about the other aspects of my life. What? You didn't know I wasn't just a heart mom?! I know, it's crazy to think I have a life outside of my super special babe, but I do. I want so badly to post about my sweet girl Elli, to post my latest pinterest projects, recipes; all the fun stuff! And so I will, starting now! Welcome to MY new (to me) blog! ;)

I will trust You.

Lord I won't forget how good You are! While I was watching Evan crawl all over the house today, and pull up and cruise the furniture, this song ran thru my head. I will never forget how faithful God has been to my family, to my son, who is such a Miracle, and all the glory and praise goes to Him..